We often embark on journeys with a clear vision of what we want to achieve. But sometimes, it's the unexpected lessons along the way that leave the most lasting impact. This is precisely what happened to me when I decided to take on the challenge of delivering a TEDx talk.

Picture this: November 11, 2023, a sunny day in Ocala, Florida. What was I doing? Oh, just delivered my very first TEDx talk! Fast forward to December 18, 2023, and there I was, my talk beaming out to the world on the TEDx YouTube channel. It is titled: "How to Lead with Hope: Solution Focused Conversation Navigation." But hold on my friends, this adventure didn't just pop out of thin air. No, no! I committed to this mission a cool 11 months earlier.

You see, I couldn't help but notice a gap in the TEDx world. Amidst all the inspiring talks, there was a shortage of school counselors and solution-focused experts taking the stage. Armed with the knowledge of how this solution-focused mindset could turbocharge communication, I decided it was high time to shake things up!

Now, let's rewind the clock to January 2023. The new year brought new determination. I was all about taking bold strides, like hiring a coach, scouring the land for opportunities, and figuring out how to shout from the rooftops that I had an idea worth sharing. Hold onto your hats, because it took 37 "thanks, but no thanks" responses before the magical email arrived. Yep, application 28 was a charm! I opened the email and It was an invitation to grace the TEDx Ocala stage. And despite Ocala being a hop, skip, and a jump (or more accurately, a cross-country flight) away from my California, I gleefully accepted. Little did I know, that's when the real sweat and elbow grease kicked in.

A commitment to work hard

TEDx Ocala paired me up with a fantastic speaking coach, and together, we embarked on a rollercoaster ride to put together a TEDx event that would leave people in awe. I was game for the hard work; I mean, who wouldn't be? But as I look back, I've come to realize that the most valuable lessons I took away from this wild ride were the ones that sneaked up on me. Buckle up, folks, 'cause we're diving into the adventure of a lifetime as I share the three invaluable lessons I learned during this transformative experience: humility, being teachable, and embracing the uncomfortable.

1. Humility

   My journey to giving a TEDx talk began with a personal affirmation in my journal. Truthfully, I had always dreamt of sharing a message of hope that could resonate across states and countries. However, when the opportunity to speak at a TEDx event across the country arose, I realized that true humility was required. I needed to release my preconceived notions and embrace the changes that would inevitably occur. It wasn't about being perfect or having everything figured out; it was about trusting the process and being open to criticism. As I asked for advice with an open mind I found that each person has wisdom that took my heart and mind to a new level and allowed me to grow. I learned to expect and embrace the ideas of others. It took humility to cut my talk down and get rid of parts that I had thought were important. It took humility to add elements that I knew would be challenging to pull off on stage for the sake of creating a better product.

2. Being Teachable

   One of the most crucial aspects of preparing for my TEDx talk was being teachable. I sought guidance from mentors, coaches, and friends, all of whom had valuable insights to offer. I learned that true humility involves being 100% present in the moment and actively listening without a background tape of doubts and resistance playing in my mind. I wanted to step back and keep it safe. I wanted to do what was comfortable. But I knew I couldn’t and the knowledge of this allowed me to enter into a teachable state that felt brand new. It was about clearing my mind and being receptive to real growth, even if it meant reevaluating and changing how to approach my ideas. The process of being teachable opened my eyes to new perspectives and improved my delivery. But most of all it allowed me to grow into a more mature and seasoned speaker. It showed me that being teachable is the key to learning anything new. It is the only way to level up in life.

3. Embracing the Uncomfortable

   Stepping onto the TEDx stage required me to embrace discomfort. I knew I would feel nervous, but I made a conscious decision to accept it. I practiced mindfulness, focusing on the present moment and appreciating the sounds and sensations around me. I chose to be okay with the unease, acknowledging that growth often arises from stepping out of our comfort zones. As the moments before my talk unfolded, I found comfort in the familiar sounds of an audience gathering, reminiscent of my days leading worship at Harvest Christian Fellowship in my hometown. It was a reminder that I had been here before and that I could succeed. Believe in your ability to move through any challenge. When you do, you might find that you already possess the ability to get through the challenges. Everything you need to succeed is there for you like it was for me. All you need to do is take the next step forward in faith.

My TEDx talk journey taught me far more than I anticipated. It instilled in me a new level of humility, the importance of being teachable, and the value of embracing discomfort. These lessons have not only impacted my public speaking abilities but have also become valuable life skills. As we approach a new year filled with aspirations and resolutions, I encourage you to reflect on your journey. Whether it's a professional goal or a personal trait you wish to improve, approach it with humility, be open to learning, and don't shy away from discomfort. In doing so, you may discover unexpected lessons that lead to profound growth and personal accomplishment.

To watch the finished product of the message that will transform how you look at successful conversations, hop over to YouTube and check it out: How to Lead with Hope: Solution Focused Conversation Navigation. It’s live right now. You have my permission to help me spread this idea far and wide on your social media, email, or text it to a friend.

And until next time, live solution focused!